Soldier Blues

VII.

Roy eased back in his chair as he read yet another report, trying and failing to sort all of his paperwork into separate piles. It seemed as though some god somewhere hated him because now he was up to his eyeballs in paperwork (which he really hated to do) and every time he managed to finish one pile of folders they were whisked away to be replaced by another pile. It seemed as though it was never going to end and Roy knew he had no way to escape because his Lieutenant was holding her pistol in her hand. It was a lazy grip to be sure, but Roy knew differently. Riza could give that brat Edward a run for his money if she really had a mind to show off. Considering the Second Lieutenant wasn’t much of a show off, Ed would have to really piss her off somehow.

He let go another sigh and tossed the latest report back onto the pile so lovingly labeled ‘in’ and stared at the empty box labeled ‘out’. He couldn’t concentrate anymore, not with the way his eyes were starting to cross and unfocus with every blink the Lieutenant Colonel made. He needed to get up, walk around, or something. It had to be against the law to do so much paperwork in one sitting, but if Roy so much as twitched to rise from the chair, Riza would have something to say to him. So the black-haired man simply leaned back as far as he could and felt his spine crack, the endorphins released by such an action wafting to his brain and settling there for a few moments. He needed to move and stretch his legs because he was sure they were atrophying from sitting for hours on end. So he looked up at his keeper and gave the blonde woman his best smile.

“Riza.”

“Two more files. Then you may take a break.”

“Two?” Roy groaned and stared at the demon wearing Riza’s body, hurrying to get back to work on those two reports before she could turn her deadly gaze on him and turn him to stone or something. Besides, if he did his work now, he wouldn’t have any to do later. Which meant he could get out onto the streets, do some inconspicuous digging, maybe have a nice date or three. But first, he had to go see the Brigadier General about his private mission and make a report of his own. It consisted basically of the fact that he’d completed his mission without a hitch (he was still debating about informing Envy about the tank and the destruction before hand) and the boy was safely with his family in Resembool. Of course, how long the kid remained there with the watchful eye of Ishbalan refugees was anyone’s guess. Maybe Edward would be safer there with constant military and refugee presence. Then again, considering whom he was related to, maybe not.

“Colonel?” Riza called after a moment, her hand on the speaker part of the phone. “The Brigadier General has requested your presence.”

“About damn time!” Roy muttered as he leaped up without trying to reveal just how happy he was about being able to get out of the office and alerting Riza to his joy at the same time. Still, she frowned at him, and Roy did his best to just get the hell out of the office before she could call the Brigadier General back and say the Lieutenant Colonel was busy.

Out in the hall, Roy slowed his pace to a strolling one, strides measured and deliberate despite the lack of the need to make haste. Envy would wait for him, he was sure, because the more time he let the green-haired Brigadier General stew in the company of Greed meant Envy wouldn’t jump down his throat when he made his own report. Oh, this afternoon was going to be fun. He certainly didn’t need anyone to tell him that, oh, no, Roy’d figured that out for himself. Never mind the fact that Roy’s idea of ‘fun’ and Envy’s idea of ‘fun’ weren’t even in the same category. Hell, they weren’t even in the same dictionary. They weren’t even the same WORD.

Roy stopped before the Brigadier General’s office door, making sure his uniform wasn’t wrinkled or stained. Anyone who knew the lazy soldier would know he was just stalling for time, making sure the Brigadier General and his partner would be at least half-way decent before company came. Roy lifted his hand to rap his knuckles on the door, waiting a good ten minutes after the command to enter before actually going in. The only thing that made Roy worry about his life was the smile on Greed’s face when he entered, as the black-haired man was reclining so easily in the Brigadier General’s chair.

Roy didn’t want to think about where the Brigadier General actually was.

The black-haired Lieutenant Colonel saluted. “I delivered the package to Resembool safely. When I left, he was safely in his home with his friend and brother.”

Greed whispered something then nodded. “Anything else?”

Roy forced himself to keep his eyes focused on somewhere on the wall above Greed’s head. “Only that there seemed to be an awfully high number of Ishbalan refugees.”

“Armed?”

Now Roy looked at Greed if only because he picked up an underlying note of worry. “I didn’t see,” Roy replied cryptically. Still, the black-haired Lieutenant Colonel knew that Greed (and Envy by default) had understood his message.

“Any suggestions?” Greed asked of the Lieutenant Colonel. Roy only shook his head.

“I can’t do any more than what I’ve already done,” Roy replied. “At this time, all I can do is complete that mountain of paperwork.”

“Then you better get back to it.” Greed’s eyes dropped to beneath the desk and Roy prudently kept his eyes focused on the Brigadier General’s chair. “And we’d like a written report of your adventures concerning the package.”

Roy couldn’t salute fast enough to get out of there and leave the two depraved soldiers to do… whatever they were doing. Roy didn’t want to think about it. He didn’t want to think about his superior officers behaving like that even though everyone knew they were fucking each other. Roy shuddered. Happy thoughts, happy thoughts. He settled back behind his desk under the careful watch of Riza and was suddenly glad for her presence. She’d keep him from blowing his brains out for sure.


“He suspects?” Envy asked Greed as they relaxed against each other after Roy’s little visit. Greed shrugged and simply continued to ride the waves of pleasure shooting up and down his spine.

“Roy’s a smart guy.” Greed said after a moment. “He’ll figure it out eventually.”

“And what do we do when he does?”

“You’re asking me?” Greed grinned. “I feel honoured.”

Envy punched the taller man in the ribs. “Answer the damn question.”

Greed punched Envy back twice as hard in the upper arm and heaved a sigh. “No, he doesn’t suspect. If he did, he wouldn’t have left. Even the Ishbalan presence didn’t send off any warning bells in the guy.”

“Can we trust him then?” Envy asked softly, wondering if he was going to be making the right decision.

Greed shrugged again and reached to pat the smaller man on the head. “Only one way to find out, Envy.”

Envy frowned and leaned back against the stronger body, closing his eyes. Only one way to find out, indeed. And it was going to be the hardest decision he’d ever made in his life because he wasn’t decided just for himself, but for someone who had no idea his life was being manipulated like this.

And all for the greater good?

Hah.

It smelled just as bad as the shit it was covering up.

Finally Envy sighed and got to his feet, stretching to his full extent and sighing as his joints popped satisfactorily. He rubbed the back of his neck and turned to look at Greed. Those black eyes just stared back at him, swearing to follow him to the very last step and beyond it. Envy scratched at his chin and smiled.

“Then we’ll keep ourselves on stand-by, let things run their given course.” Envy said softly. “If things go south, then we step in.”

“Meddling without meddling?”

“I made a promise to someone, Greed,” Envy said with a slight snarl. “I’m not going to let that promise become false.”

Greed just stared at his commanding officer for a long, long while. Finally he nodded and rose, stretching himself. “Well,” he finally said at length, “I guess I have to keep you alive so you can keep that promise.”

Envy cracked a true smile, and though it was short lived, Greed knew he was grateful. The black-haired man reached out to cup his superior’s chin to give him a long, slow kiss. In that kiss was his own promise, and Envy, for once, accepted that promise.