Koneka's Excellent Vacation

Humor/Romance. Rated NC-17. A chapter or two are citrus-flavored! I’m taking liberties with the Cell saga. Even though it follows the Cell Games closely, it will always be A/U if a new character is introduced. Some of the timeline has been changed in the beginning. If you’ve seen any of the movies, you’ll know that even the creators don’t care about the facts that much! However, every single character will be in character. No OOC in this one, babe.

Disclaimer: I don’t own the DBZ characters. They are the property of their respective owners. I’m not making any money from this - I write for the love of Toriyama’s characters and for the love of writing! Don’t sue me. I’m broke - you won’t get a dime anyway.

Koneka belongs to me. Errrr... sort of. ;-) I have nothing else to say!

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Koneka’s Excellent Vacation, Part 1

I love life! So much to do, so much to see...and so little time for it all. Just your average fun-loving, adventurous, artist-type girl next door with average aspirations and an average life peppered with an extraordinary week or two every year when I pull out all the stops and r-r-r-really live!

Average, that is, until they came into my life. Or, I should say, he. And he didn’t quite sashay in. He came in with a BIG BANG!

It started the first week of my vacation on my personal island — well, mine insofar as it’s not owned by anyone else. If possession is nine-tenths of the law, then I guess I own it two weeks out of the year! This year, I needed a little peace, so I anchored my boat at the dock, set up my camp and hauled out my easel, canvas and oils and decided to spend some quality time with the sea and the dolphins. Last year it was wind sailing and cavorting with sharks who playfully nipped at my ankles. This year I didn’t feel like such a close encounter.

The seascape began to come to life under my brush — even the uncooperative dolphins found a permanent spot on my canvas. I was thinking life was good — it didn’t get any better than this — when my life began to turn around.

At first I thought it was thunder, a good storm brewing. Except that the sky was sapphire dotted with fluffy clouds that scudded past in the sea breezes. And as the sound got closer and closer, I realized they were explosions. A plume of smoke rose in the east over the horizon, another one to the north, and yet another to the west. I suddenly realized that while I was gaping at the sky, oil paint was dripping onto my lap. With a yelp, I jumped up and, in my haste, dropped my brush.

“Crap!” I bent over to retrieve it and suddenly the island to my immediate left disintegrated. While I was still gaping at the spectacle, I heard a shrill whistling sound and suddenly two strong arms scooped me up and I was yanked into the air.

How should I describe this? Okay, here I am, this average girl, minding my own business when something or someone starts blowing up islands, and then a flying man rescues me. Not only that, but while I’m tucked under his left arm, he’s screaming and shooting fireballs out of his right palm. If I could have gotten either of my arms to move out of their petrified state, I’d’ve pinched myself to see if I was dreaming.

But it was no dream. While the smoke was rising, my “hero” wheeled one hundred eighty degrees and tore through the air so fast that I could hardly breathe. And when he finally landed, he dumped me unceremoniously on the ground where I landed with a thud.

“Ouch! Watch it, you oaf!”

“Vejiiiita! The least you could do is put her down gently!”

“Hmph. Why?” He had a deep voice like gravel and smoke.

A little bald-headed guy was leaning over me and offering me his hand, which I accepted. “Are you okay?”

I nodded as he hauled me to my feet, and, as I dusted myself off, I finally was able to study my rescuer. He stood at an angle partly faced away from me with his arms folded and legs spread shoulder-width apart. Dressed in a tight blue uniform that accentuated his ... ummmm... attributes, and properly accessorized with white gloves and boots, he was simply the most beautiful and powerful man I had ever seen in my life! He had thick black hair that stood up in spikes from the back of his neck and stuck straight into the air. And bulging muscles. Everywhere. I mean everywhere.

I was in lust.

The little bald guy was watching me with a grin. He leaned toward me conspiratorially and whispered, “That’s Prince Vejita. He’s always l ike that.” The emphasis on the title was just the littlest bit sarcastic and pulled a snarl from the man.

“Shut up, you fool!” The man called Vejita ran three steps and burst into the air with such power that the force knocked me over again. The bald guy was laughing and helping me to my feet for the second time.

“Geeeez!” was about all I could manage.

“Ha ha! I’m Krillen, by the way.”

“Koneka.”

He was offering me his hand again, this time for a hearty handshake. Cripes, what a bone-crushing grip he had for such a little guy! He was a couple inches shorter than me, and I’m pretty short!

“I suppose you’d like to know what’s going on.”

“That would be my first question, yes.” And as I uttered those words, I finally had a chance to look around me. I was on a tiny island with a pink house, and an old man in sunglasses was exiting the front door.

“Krillen!” he said and then looked me up and down. Behind those glasses I couldn’t guess what he was thinking, but by the “mm mm mm” he was uttering, I assumed that the perv liked what he saw. I raised one eyebrow and folded my arms Vejita-style across my chest and growled. If he was going to look at me like a piece of meat, then I’d act like a piece of meat!

“Master Roshi, Vejita rescued another one from the islands. This is Koneka.”

“Just what am I being rescued from?” I asked then remembered the explosions.

“Haven’t you heard? It’s on all the channels,” Roshi said, and the three of us entered the house. Upon stepping across the threshhold, I saw another man lying on a mat watching TV. He looked up and my heart stopped. Was there no end to the beautiful men in this place? It was a girl’s fantasy island! This one was young and handsome with long lavender hair. He rolleer ter twice to make room for Krillen and me.

Then a voice from the other side of the room said “Cell is on a rampage blowing up islands.” The body attached to this voice was big, handsome, and had a couple sexy scars. I gulped. Krillen snickered. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine this house as my personal male harem. When I opened them, I was still just me, and they were looking at me curiously.

“Who’s Cell?” I finally managed, which pulled some shocked looks.

“Where’ve you been, on a deserted island?” Krillen said. “Oh, yeah, you were! Yeah, Yamcha, Vejita just rescued Koneka here from being blown to smithereens. That makes three. Trunks, shove over just a little more. Thanks.”

I beat Krillen to the spot right next to Trunks the hunk and grinned at him, then tented my fingers to make a frame and looked at him through it. His lips parted in a silent “huh?”

“Ever had your portrait painted? No? You should.” He blinked twice.

Krillen was enjoying himself too much laughing at me.

“Knock it off,” I growled. “So this Prince Vejita is the hero of the day, huh? Where are the others he rescued?”

“They couldn’t wait to get out of here. You’re different, though. Got the same feisty spirit as our resident prince.”

“That so.”

“It is so,” he said, lowering his voice to a funny bass pitch. I was beginning to like this guy.

“He coming back?” I tried to keep the eagerness out of my voice. On cue, that same whistling sound I had heard during my daring rescue interrupted all conversation. A golden trail in the sky outside the window curled back in on itself and a light *TMP* upstairs signaled the arrival of said prince. Apparently through a window. Unconventional, these guys.

“Yes,” Krillen said, still grinning. Moments later, Vejita came down the stairs and my heart really did stop this time. He was even more handsome in a yellow sweater and brown trousers. Yikes.

Assuming it would be rude of me to make a grab for him in front of all these people, I smiled and waved at him. He scowled and walked over to lean against the window sill, assuming his cross-armed position.

Krillen nudged me and waggled his eyebrows. I’m not sure, but I think I blushed.

Trunks had control of the remote control and was flipping through channels. Every single one had some news story about Cell, and I was getting impatient for him to land on one and stay there. Which he finally did. The news crew had gone out to the islands and were transmitting pictures of the smoking ruins.

“How long were you on the island?” Trunks asked me. His voice had that delicious timbre young men get once they’ve passed puberty, but haven’t quite made it to adulthood. Which made him too young for me. I sighed.

“A couple days. I’m on vacation.”

The cameramen were panning the area, and then I saw it. My boat. Smashed and bobbing in the water, the rope still tied to a piling, which was smashed and bobbing in the water. They panned in closer and I saw my palette float by. I propped my elbows on my knees and clutched my head.

“That’s my stuff. Crap. Now I have to buy ll all again.”

He spoke. “Well, at least you’re alive, so quit complaining.”

I looked at Krillen who just raised his eyebrows. The newsman was saying that Cell was still on the rampage. I stood up and put one foot ahead of the other until I was facing Vejita.

What a marvelous smirk he had! He wasn’t very tall, but taller than me. I stopped inches from him, put one hand on my hip and raised my chin. Then I raised my right hand, curled back all my fingers except my index finger, and stuck that in the middle of his chest.

Looking at my finger, he snickered, this eis eyes met mine. If I wasn’t already committed to this, I would have melted at his feet, but I drew myself up and scowled.

“Yes, thank you so much, your highness. But that stuff was expensive, and the boat wasn’t mine. And I’m on vacation.”

His hand came up and it seemed to be in slow motion. He grasped my wrist and held it there a moment, laughing softly in that sarcastic way he has.

“And what do you want me to do about it?” he said, still grasping my wrist. I willed myself to stay conscious.

“You are going to entertain me,” I said.

continued....