Worlds Collide | By : TheBatcave Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 776 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Ball Z, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Chapter 28: Fragment
It took another 24 hours for the antranide to completely leave Gohan's system, and a further two days for him to finally stop shaking. His temperature came down, and now all he seemed to do was sleep.
Bulma reassured Chi Chi and Goku that this was what she expected would happen; Gohan's body had just taken on a massive ordeal and needed time to heal itself. Through those first couple of days, Piccolo kept having to change his clothes because Gohan would just sweat through them all. When he stopped withdrawing, Goku took it upon himself to bathe him, like he used to when they were training in the time chamber whenever Gohan fell ill.
By the fourth day, Chi Chi welcomed Goten back into the room to see his older brother. The poor kid did nothing but ask about him since he was made to stay with young Trunks. The sleeping arrangement they had was Gohan on one side of the bed, Chi Chi next to him with the baby in a crib beside her, and Goku slept on the floor on the other side of Gohan, both of his parents taking shifts to make sure that he was still breathing through the night.
On day five, Goten decided to sneak young Trunks in, who was curious to see Gohan again.
"Ssh, he's sleeping," whispered Goten.
"My mom said he's been asleep for days," replied Trunks, also keeping his voice down.
As Goten and Trunks began to chat away as quietly as they could, Gohan opened his eyes for the first time since his seizure. His eyes took a while to adjust to his surroundings; he had no idea where he was or how he got there, and couldn't remember what he was doing prior. All he knew was that his body felt like a dead weight, he'd never felt so exhausted in his entire life.
"Goten, he's waking up!" said Trunks.
"Gohan!" said Goten, his voice still quiet as not to disturb him too much.
Gohan looked at his brother's face. He knew who he was for a moment, but then he didn't recognise him. Even when Goten began affectionately stroking his hand, he couldn't feel it, his body didn't feel like his. His eyes became hazy, gazing at nothing.
"Why is he staring off like that?" asked Trunks, getting a little uncomfortable.
Gohan was dissociating again. He couldn't feel his alter coming through, he just felt like he didn't exist.
"Boys, what are you doing in here?" asked Chi Chi as she entered.
"Gohan's awake, mom!"
Even Chi Chi was concerned by how motionless and blank he was.
"Come on boys, Gohan needs to rest."
She shooed them from the room, closing the door and sitting carefully on the bed next to him. She ran her hand through his hair gently, taking his hand in hers. Somehow this time, she knew exactly what he needed to hear.
"It's okay. You're safe here. You can rest."
Gohan seemed to sigh with relief unconsciously, his eyes slowly fell shut again and he drifted off to sleep.
"I heard Gohan woke up, this morning," said Jeice as he caught up with Bulma. She was on her way to the infirmary with Vegeta, Tien and Trunks. She never went there alone for her own safety, even though after five says, Cell still hadn't woken up himself.
"Yeah, he's through the worst of it now. He just needs a lot of rest. I'm hoping he'll eat something tomorrow," she said. "That'll be a fight in itself, he hasn't eaten in over a week - oh crap, he's awake!"
She stopped in her tracks as she entered the infirmary - Cell had literally just put his feet on the floor to stand up. She calmed herself down before marching herself over to him, much to the surprise of the others.
"Stop! Hold on a second!"
She stood in front of him, Cell was extremely disoriented, trying to remember what happened. He went to remove the cannula from his hand when he realised what was pulling on him.
"Wait, don't do that!"
Cell finally noticed she was there, and stopped what he was doing. It took him a second to recognise her as Vegeta's wife.
"You see that?" she said, pointing at the bag full of a green coloured medication on the drip stand. "That's stopping you from feeling any withdrawal from the antranide. Now from what I've been told, you don't want to go through that again, so I suggest you stay here, and finish your treatment. The antranide should be completely out of your system soon."
Cell gave her an unreadable look that scared her a little. He eyed Vegeta, Tien, Trunks and Jeice not far behind her, and silently agreed, sitting back down on the bed.
"You've got two more bags after this and then you should be in the clear."
"You planning on going back on it, or are you finally done with that crap?" asked Jeice.
Cell rolled his eyes and laughed.
"Why the concern?" he asked, still as snarky as ever.
"Just need to know so that we can keep Gohan away from it," said Vegeta, stepping forward.
"So he made it, did he? He's made of tougher stuff than I thought," he remarked.
"It was touch and go, but yeah. He got through it. He's still resting," said Bulma.
"How long have I been in here?"
"We found you five days ago," said Jeice. Piccolo walked into the room, hearing chatter.
"So you're finally awake. You come anywhere near Gohan, and you'll have me to answer to!"
"Please... " laughed Cell. "You all act like he's innocent in this. I never made him take those pills."
"You manipulated him!"
"So you just gave him the antranide when he asked for it? I find that hard to believe," said Vegeta.
"Not exactly. I had a limited supply since I can't get to hell to get more. I told him that if he wanted in, he had to make it worth my while."
"What?!" gasped Jeice. "You made him pay for them?"
"He was popping those pills like they were sweets. Do you know how damaged he must be to want to escape that badly?"
"How did he pay for them, Cell?" asked Vegeta, gritting his teeth.
"On his knees mostly."
The next thing Cell knew, Vegeta had him by the throat, a ki blast charging in his other hand.
"You'd be surprised how long he can hold his breath for," he snarled.
"Dad, stop!" shouted Trunks, yanking Vegeta off him. "This is what he wants!" Everyone looked at Trunks, who seemed to be the only one to figure it out. "That overdose wasn't an accident, was it?"
"You had to eventually realise why Gohan was so drawn to me," he said, not letting that smirk fall once. "Somebody else with that suicidal energy ..." He looked right at Trunks. "It takes one to know one."
Before Trunks could react to that, Piccolo stepped in.
"Listen. You are going to stay here and get yourself well. And when this is over, you can go back to hell and take as many drugs as you want."
Cell sneered at him, laying back on the bed as they all turned to leave.
"Send Gohan my love, would you?" he shouted after them mockingly.
Another two days passed, and Gohan woke up properly for the first time, responding well. He had most of his tubes removed apart from the one giving him fluids. Once he finally sat up, Goku helped him to the bathroom, both to see if he could go, and so he could take a bath. He went straight back to bed after that, it seemed to zap all his energy.
The time had finally come to try and get him to eat. He hadn't had any food for around two weeks now. Chi Chi started him off slow, with half a slice of toast, which he ate slowly over two hours. That evening, she tried to see how he'd go with some soup, which unfortunately ended up being vomited into the trash can next to the bed which was rightfully put there just in case.
The morning after that, he managed two slices of toast and a mug of tea, much to his parents' delight. He remained sat up in bed most of the time, needing help to get to the bathroom when he had to go. Chi Chi sat down with him later in the day after he finished his lunch, which was a chicken sandwich. It thankfully stayed down as his appetite finally began to return to normal.
But she was still extremely worried - Gohan hadn't said a word this entire time.
"Are you going to talk to me today?"
Gohan looked at her for a second, he opened his mouth but nothing came out.
"It's okay if you don't want to. I've got all the time in the world."
Silence followed for a few minutes, then two tiny words cut through it.
"I'm sorry... " he said quietly, his eyes looking down at his lap.
"There's no need to be sorry - "
"I'm so sorry," he said tearfully, covering his face as he broke down. That was why he didn't want to talk, because he knew everything would come pouring out at once.
"Oh, Gohan... "
She took him into his arms. He cried uncontrollably on her shoulder, hugging her just as hard as she hugged him back. He seemed to want to snap himself out of it, pulling out of her embrace.
"I need to stop crying," he said, trying to get a grip on his emotions.
"No, you listen to me," she replied, cupping his face. "If you need to cry, then you cry. Don't underestimate what you've been through."
Gohan silently agreed, tears still spilling out of his eyes. It took him a good hour to stop, and when he did, he went back to sleep for a couple of hours.
Chi Chi had finally forgiven Jeice a few days ago, allowing him to come and visit. When she went to go and prepare dinner, she asked Jeice to come and visit Gohan as she didn't want to leave him by himself, Goku had returned to his training that day to ensure that he had a full grasp on his power before it was time to fight again.
"Hey kid!"
Gohan's face seemed to light up as he walked in, and his eyes lit up even more when he saw Trunks with him. For some stupid reason, he had the urge to tidy up his hair at seeing him.
"Well you're looking less... dead," he said bluntly as he sat by the bed. Trunks stood by the door.
"Thanks?" he said with a pretend smile.
"Jeice!"
The alien rolled his eyes as he heard Burter calling him from down the hall.
"What now?!" He stood up to leave. "Sorry, I'll be back in a minute."
Trunks raised his eyebrows as Jeice scurried out of the door, laughing a little.
"He's a real character."
"Yep," said Gohan, his eyes once again finding his lap. He didn't know what to say to him exactly, but he seemed to enjoy his company more than anybody else he'd seen so far... almost.
"Has anyone talked to you about Cell?" asked Trunks, somehow knowing he was on Gohan's mind.
"No... I won't lie, I've been wondering where he was."
Trunks sat down on the bed next to him as Gohan sat up properly, crossing his legs in front of him.
"Not long after we found you when you collapsed, we found him too. It turned out that... he'd taken an overdose."
Gohan sighed, making sure he heard that right.
"Well, he's a big fat liar... he told me I'd cleaned him out," he paused as all the pieces fell into place. It was if he just knew. "It was deliberate, wasn't it?" he asked, finally looking at Trunks properly.
"Seems so."
"My first thought is to call him a dick, but... I get it. More than most," he said. "He no longer saw the point in anything, I suppose it was just a matter of time, but I didn't think he'd actually do it."
"I understand."
"No you don't - "
"Yes, I do."
Gohan looked up again, into his eyes and saw it there, staring him right in the face. Before Gohan could say anything, his mother entered with a plate of food for him.
"Hi, Trunks! You're welcome to stay if you want."
"I should go, my mom's expecting me," he said. As Chi Chi had her back turned, he put his hand over Gohan's. "I'm here if you want to talk about it."
Gohan's eyes followed him as he left, taking in that bombshell... Trunks had been there too, and he had no idea.
A couple more days and he was back on his feet, escaping his parents for a little while. Gohan took a deep breath before he finally opened the door to Cell's room that night. It was empty, but immaculate. It seemed that Mr Popo had cleaned the place up after he and Cell practically destroyed it. He wondered for a second whether Mr Popo had got rid of... everything. He checked the gap between the bedside table and the bed, and found what he was looking for.
He sighed with relief as he pulled a small chopping knife out. He finally had some time to himself for more than five minutes. He slumped down to the floor, upright against the bed and pulled off his left wrist band. He'd never seen his wrists so well healed in years since he'd been out for the count for so long - but he only saw it as an almost blank canvas to work on. He spent the next ten minutes retracing some of his old scars, bleeding them down his arm for a while.
Gohan had been wanting to do this for days, more so when he found out about Cell's technically attempted suicide. He felt angry at himself for not being there or being aware enough to stop him. He felt sad that if the android wasn't found in the time that he was, Gohan would have been left all alone in this world. Usually, cutting helped him feel better after feeling such emotions, but this time, it didn't help at all. He could feel his mind slipping once again. He didn't want to exist.
He used tissues and his own spittle to clean the blood off himself and waited for his wounds to dry up before replacing his wristband. As he did that, it was as if his body was finished for now. That numbing feeling took him over completely as he stared off into the opposite wall, and he retreated back into his brain.
Gohan was back in that dark bedroom, sat against the bed just as his body was in the outside world. He looked behind himself to see his saiyan half fast asleep at the foot of the bed, not stirring. He'd been like that for days now. He looked ever so peaceful.
Gohan wanted to wake him so badly. He was so, so tired. He wanted a turn to sleep and not have to deal with the real world for a while.
"Hey... "
He nudged him as well, trying to get him to wake up, but he didn't budge. His other half seemed to be a very deep sleeper, and only woke up when it suited him, unless their physical body was in danger. And since he wasn't in harm's way right now, there was no way he was going to be able to get him to take over.
He didn't want to leave his body in such a vulnerable state, but he needed to rest his eyes... just for moment.
"So, you're in one piece," said Cell, shutting the door. He'd finally completed his treatment and left the infirmary as soon as he was able. Whereas Gohan looked more or less healthy as if he hadn't taken anything, Cell retained some of the antranide's affects, seeming even more slender than before. When Gohan didn't answer him, he stopped for a moment - he was unnervingly still.
He knelt down to his level slowly, as not to startle him; Gohan seemed to be gone completely, as if he'd left his body. After a few seconds, Gohan moved a little, and Cell saw tears begin rolling down his face.
"Gohan?"
The boy jumped a little, his arms hugging himself protectively.
"Who are you?"
Cell stopped himself from answering when Gohan finally looked at him. Tears were still pouring out, terror in his eyes and face.
"Are you a m-monster?" he stuttered in a quiet voice.
"No." Cell didn't know why he said that automatically. Usually, he relished in scaring people, but even this was proving to be... unsettling. He had to try and get Gohan back, because this certainly wasn't him. But it wasn't his saiyan half either. Cell's answer seemed to calm him somewhat, but not a lot. He stopped clutching onto his own arms and began fidgeting with his clothes nervously.
"Do you know where my daddy is?"
... What? This was new. And disturbing. He was talking like a child.
"Do you know where you are?"
"Uh... no... " he answered, his voice quivering. "H-he locked me in here. I don't know how to get out."
"Who locked you in here?" asked the android as softly as he could manage. The door wasn't locked when he came in. Was he hallucinating?
"A bad man came and took me away. He locked me in here... he said my daddy would come and save me."
"Gohan, the door isn't locked. Your father is down the hall - "
"Why do you keep calling me that?"
"That's your name."
"No it's not. My name is... " he trailed off. Cell observed him as he tried to figure that out for himself. He expected him to panic when he couldn't answer, but then he started crying harder. "Where's my daddy? I want my mom!"
What the hell is going on? Cell was disturbed by it to say the least. Had Gohan regressed? Was he reliving a memory? Post traumatic stress wouldn't have been too out there to suggest after the life he'd had.
"He's gonna take me away!" he sobbed. He was getting more and more worked up as time passed, descending into a panic attack, and Cell didn't know what to do other than watch. He didn't know how to calm him. He was hoping that Gohan would come out again by himself at some point.
"Nobody is taking you away. You're safe here," he said carefully. Gohan seemed to calm down a little at that. "How old are you?"
"Um... four. Four a-and a half," he said, his voice still small and shy.
Cell managed not to curse in front of him at least. This was too much. Either he was indeed reliving a childhood memory or he had mentally regressed after what he'd just been through with the antranide.
A few seconds, he said. Resting his eyes, he said. Gohan shot upright again when he realised he'd fallen asleep. He could hear crying. It was loud and nearby. He turned around to see his saiyan half still sleeping like the dead.
He put his hands on the floor and crawled around to the foot of the bed to see where that sobbing was coming from.
"What the hell?"
There was a child in the corner.
"Hey, are you okay?" he asked, crawling closer.
As he neared the sobbing child, he could see him more clearly - black hair, pale skin, a yellow shirt with green sleeves and pants that looked a little big on him still.
"No... " It was himself. His four year old self. His four year old self locked in a saiyan pod crying for his father. "It's okay. You're safe with me."
Gohan reached out at put his hand on his head, stroking his hair. The little boy lifted up his head and stared back with teary eyes.
"You look like my mom. And you look like my dad too."
Gohan began to tear up himself a little at that. The only person who could console this frightened little boy... was himself.
"I'm gonna take care of you. You're safe here."
The little boy scurried forwards and dived into him, Gohan held him close, feeling him finally calm down.
"It's gonna be okay."
Gohan felt an odd sense of closure, consoling his younger self. But he also felt a huge sense of responsibility. If this little boy was in the room with them, and able to fully interact with him, that meant that he was an alter too, originating from an early traumatic event.
He figured what he just went through with the antranide was enough for his mind to split off again. Why it manifested in this particular way, he had no idea. But the memory where this boy came from was his very first trauma. Maybe that was it. For now the child seemed to be a fragment of that memory, with the potential to become his own person. He had a feeling that he'd stay four years old forever, though.
"I'm sleepy," he muttered, sniffling and yawning to himself.
"Come on, I'll tuck you in."
Gohan picked up the exhausted child as he stood, he was already dosing off in his arms as he lay him down next to his saiyan half under the covers. The boy drifted off as soon as his head hit the pillow, sucking his thumb.
The crying stopped. The child retreated back into Gohan's head whilst outwardly dissociating again. Cell merely sat beside him and waited. He didn't have to wait too long, however. Soon enough, Gohan was back, wiping the tears from his face.
"Gohan?"
"Fuck!" he cursed, jumping. "How long have you been there?"
"I came in ten minutes ago. You were sobbing like a baby."
Gohan's eyes widened. Not only had a child alter formed, but it had just physically manifested too while he was sleeping... in front of Cell.
"What happened? You didn't scare him did you?"
"Scare who?" said Cell. "All I know is one minute you were gone, and the next you're crying for your father and telling me how a bad man locked you in here."
"Oh, you're kidding me... " he sighed, his head falling into his hands.
"What was that?" he asked. "You said you were four years old."
"He is four years old," he said. Cell didn't answer, looking confused. "I'm having some trouble processing what the fuck this just happened, but in short, I've got a new roomie in my head."
"And he's... a child?"
"He's me when I was four. Locked in a space pod by my evil dick of an uncle who I'd literally just met and I was waiting for my dad to come and save me."
"So all that he was crying about actually happened?"
"Yeah. My dad did come to save me, but that child is from that specific moment where hes just been kidnapped and locked in that pod. He's still in there waiting to be saved."
"So where is he now?"
"He's sleeping," Gohan smiled for a moment as he remembered what happened. "I gave him a hug, scooped him up and tucked him into bed. He's safe."
"Well, that must have been cathartic for you."
"It was, I guess." After a long silence, Gohan finally asked that all consuming question. "You tried to end it didn't you?"
"What?"
"You overdosed on purpose."
Cell didn't answer him for a while, an unreadable look on his face.
"Yes," he said finally. Gohan just looked at him, saying nothing. He understood more than most that there was nothing to say. "I think I'm going to lie down. I'm still not back at full strength just yet."
Cell lay down on top of the fresh new covers, Gohan followed, kicking off his shoes and joining him, instantly in the android's arms again. It felt good to have his arms around him again. They lay there for about half an hour, snoozing on and off. After a while, Cell turned onto his side, waking Gohan as he moved. They ended up face to face, staring at each other in silence.
Cell didn't move much, feeling Gohan place his hand over his neck and shoulder, coming closer to brush their noses together. Cell wondered if he even had the energy for this right now, and after witnessing Gohan regress into a child-like state not even an hour ago, it was strange to see him make sexual advances towards him again. He shrugged off the weirdness of what happened earlier and didn't stop Gohan as he very softly and briefly kissed him with caution. The arm that Cell had draped over his waist curled around his back and drew him in closer. Gohan kissed him deeper, his hand still on his shoulder.
Gohan found himself getting carried away, pushing his shoulder and forcing him onto his back. He threw his leg over him and rolled on top of him, his kissed becoming more heated as he moved around on top of him. Cell's fingers were tangled with his hair, the other on his back, then both his hands landed on his hips. Gohan pulled away a little, going for his neck. He was being aggressive in any way, the way he was tracing lips along his neck was very affectionate.
"I love you," he whispered, getting lost in the moment, placing more tender kisses on his skin before returning to his face. The android didn't answer as usual, but Gohan learned not to expect him to by now.
Cell turned them back over onto their sides, Gohan's leg still draped over him. Cell gripped onto it, still kissing him, Gohan's hand on his face. Cell's hand slowly slithered up his thigh, before disappearing between his legs. Gohan moaned into the kiss as he began to pump him through his clothes, but then...
"Wait... stop," he panted, breaking off from the kiss.
"What is it?" asked Cell, letting go of him and putting his hand back on his thigh.
"I don't... I'm not ready yet," he confessed, not quite looking at him.
"That's fine," answered Cell.
"Are you sure?" he asked, a nervous laugh coming through.
Cell understood. Gohan had just been through something extremely traumatic, and he could tell he was still exhausted because the android also felt it. The reason Gohan was really here was because he was craving affection and intimacy, but not necessarily in the form of sex.
"Shall we just call it a night?" he asked.
Gohan sighed with relief, giving him one last passionate kiss before settling down in his arms.
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